EEWWBROCCOLI

rocketpowers:

there are teenagers who have unprotected sex but have a case for their iphone

just let that sink in

officialfrenchtoast:

"dinner is ready"

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vercxce:

My internet was down for 5 minutes so i went downstairs and spoke to my family

They seem like nice people

bikinipowerbottom:

"She’s really pretty for a black girl"

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“He’s really cool for a gay guy”

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“She’s doing really well for a woman”

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elsasexual:

when your computer insists that it has urgent updates

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My BFF Coming out to her 89 Year old Grandmother
BFF: Grandmother I need to talk to you
Grandma: [concerned voice] What? What is it? Are you sick?
BFF: No, no. Grandma. I'm gay.
Grandma: What?
BFF: I'm gay Grandma. I have a girlfriend now.
Grandma: [relieved voice] Oh honey, is that all? I thought you had cancer. Anytime someone needs to tell me something they are sick. Who's your girlfriend, when is her birthday? I'll bake her a pie.

bitchesgetshitdone:

I get so overwhelmed whenever I get an iTunes gift card

Like what music do I deem worthy enough to legally purchase?